Changes

6 Oct

Image from vi.sualize.us

I’ve been alluding to some changes in my life that I’ve been wanting to make in the last few months. One of the more major aspects of my life to which I’d been referring is work. While on the most part I’m happy with what I’m doing – like everyone else, there are good days and there are bad days – I’ve felt for a long time that I needed a change. For me, it’s an ongoing search for more balance between life and work. In the industry that I work, and the role that I fill, it’s nearly impossible for me to confine myself within that 9 to 5 window. I take work home with me, whether it’s physically or mentally – I am not able to just “switch off” when I leave my desk. My mind is constantly racing with all work-related problems to solve, and thinking of solutions to offer. I’m really good at what I do. I strive for excellence in my work, and I’m really hard on myself when I deliver something that I consider to be less than that.

In a more conventional setting, what I do would be split between two different people. There are two roles that occupy my single body at my work. And yes, while I am able to manage this and do my job(s) well, it is taxing as I’m required to switch gears so quickly many times in the course of a day. I find myself in a position where I am constantly reacting, when I would much rather be in a position where I could give more careful thought to what I am doing.

Not to say that this isn’t a privileged position, because it is – I’ve learned a great deal just by doing and being, and that’s taken me to a point in my career now where I can choose between two paths. I’m happy to say that I’ve made that choice, and my new journey down that more focused career path starts at the end of this month. It was a little heartbreaking to resign from my job – I actually cried while telling my boss about my decision this past Monday, that I’ve accepted an offer from another company for a truly terrific opportunity. I mean, who does that? Cries when handing over a resignation letter to her male boss? I’m such a weenie! So, it’s worth saying that my resignation doesn’t come from a place of complete unhappiness or dissatisfaction. I’ve been here for a few years, and have made some good friends out of colleagues and as much as I have become ingrained within the culture and community of my company, that culture and community is as equally a huge part of me too. Saying goodbye to all this will be a lot harder than I imagined.

The whole process unfolded rather quickly. I got a tiny nudge from a friend with whom I used to work to start thinking about my career and how it was affecting my lifestyle. A couple of days later, I sent my résumé out to two postings that I came across, interviewed at both companies, and received an offer of employment from one. This was all in the span of two weeks. I’d been contemplating an active search for a new job for a while, but was holding myself back because of timing – there’s that big overseas trip that I’m taking at the end of the year and I worried that any potential employer would see that as irresponsible and maybe question my commitment to them. I was also worried that the job search process was going to be a long and drawn out one, and that there were only a limited amount of lies I could create to explain why I had to be away from work for interviews. Plus, I had just gained another week’s vacation at my company, which I was completely psyched about, and will not even have had an opportunity to take advantage of because my tenure there ends in just two and a half weeks.

Though now I realize that the timing is actually quite perfect for this transition. I’d applied for this job on a bit of a whim, and that whim became a major decision I had to make that would impact my life in a really positive way.

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8 Responses to “Changes”

  1. Randy Pena October 6, 2010 at 8:55 pm #

    Nice writing style. I look forward to reading more in the future.

  2. Elisse October 6, 2010 at 9:12 pm #

    Changing jobs is a very significant Life shift, and it sounds like you feel good about the decision you made. Not that it was easy to do. Good luck in your new position – congrats!

  3. Maureen October 6, 2010 at 10:43 pm #

    WOH! so much has happened to you recently. it’s definitely an exciting time in your life. changes will always occur and can be great as long as we embrace them.

    Congratulations! i’m very excited for you!

  4. Steph October 6, 2010 at 11:00 pm #

    @Elisse: Thanks – no, it certainly wasn’t easy to do but I’m excited and happy about my decision. I can’t wait to see what this new position offers me!

    @Maur: Very well said, and I am trying hard to not be so afraid of change anymore. Ha! Lots has happened lately, so I guess this was a good month for me to do the 30 Day Challenge! Thanks for your words of encouragement!

  5. Angie October 7, 2010 at 4:35 am #

    Ohhhh what a great adventure!! Life is about decisions we make, and the first and best start is to make a decision… because no decision is a decision to do nothing. Read that somewhere. You should be so proud of yourself. I am rooting for this job!!

    • Steph October 7, 2010 at 9:14 am #

      Yay Angie! Thanks so much for your encouraging words!

  6. Leesh October 9, 2010 at 9:03 pm #

    Wow Steph! Congratulations! That’s awesome you took that leap to see if you can make a career move and in such a short process it happened for you. I hope some of your good luck and push for a change rubs off on me. I want to find a new job but I am too comfortable with my routine and my four weeks vacation (actually it’s almost close to five).

    I wish you all the best and good luck on your first day whenever that is. Email me and let me know where you will be working. Or we can catch up when we watch SYTYCD in 10 more days.

    • Steph October 9, 2010 at 9:30 pm #

      Thanks Leesh! In fact, one of the big motivators for me to seek this change was my level of comfort in my day-to-day at my job. I was being challenged, but not in the right ways there.

      I can’t believe SYTYCD is so soon! Can’t wait.

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